#include "win31.h"
           #include "win95.h"
           #include "win98.h"
           #include "workst~1.h"
           #include "evenmore.h"
           #include "oldstuff.h"
           #include "billrulz.h"
           #include "monopoly.h"
           #define INSTALL = HARD
 
           char make_prog_look_big[1600000];
           void main()
           {
               while(!CRASHED)
               {
                   display_copyright_message();
                   display_bill_rules_message();
                   do_nothing_loop();
                   if (first_time_installation)
                   {
                       make_50_megabyte_swapfile();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       totally_screw_up_HPFS_file_system();
                       search_and_destroy_the_rest_of_OS/2();
                       make_futile_attempt_to_damage_Linux();
                       disable_Netscape();
                       disable_RealPlayer();
                       disable_Lotus_Products();
                       hang_system();
                   }
 
                   write_something(anything);
                   display_copyright_message();
                   do_nothing_loop();
                   do_some_stuff();
 
                   if (still_not_crashed)
                   {
                       display_copyright_message();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       basically_run_windows_3.1();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                       do_nothing_loop();
                   }
               }
 
               if (detect_cache())
                   disable_cache();
 
               if (fast_cpu())
               {
                    set_wait_states(lots);
                    set_mouse(speed, very_slow);
                    set_mouse(action, jumpy);
                    set_mouse(reaction, sometimes);
               }
 
               /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.1");    */
               /* printf("Welcome to Windows 3.11");   */
               /* printf("Welcome to Windows 95");     */
               /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 3.0"); */
               /* printf("Welcome to Windows 98");     */
               /* printf("Welcome to Windows NT 4.0"); */
               printf("Welcome to Windows 2000");
 
               if (system_ok())
                   crash(to_dos_prompt)
               else
                   system_memory = open("a:\swp0001.swp", O_CREATE);
 
               while(something)
               {
                   sleep(5);
                   get_user_input();
                   sleep(5);
                   act_on_user_input();
                   sleep(5);
               }
               create_general_protection_fault();
           }